Semi-permanent is a yearly design driven event showcasing some of the most talented (inter)national creatives. The two day event, held at Aotea centre in Auckland, allows the design community to take a break, be amongst peers, get inspired and as we later realize get our brains melted.

The line-up was promising, but having been to quite a few of these events before there is always the danger of speakers going into a snore-fest "and-this-is-what -I did-next" portfolio speech, showing all the stuff that we already know. Needless to say I went into the whole thing with reasonable doubt.

The joy of doubt

And it was that same doubt that TL (Tea) Uglow used to deliver one of the most engaging talks I ever witnessed.

First of all it is worth noting that I saw Tea 2 years ago at Semi Permanent in Wellington. Tea back then wasn’t Tea, Tea was Tom, a guy from google lab Sydney (where she still works), presenting the Google Cube. Earlier this year Tea came to probably the biggest realisation of her life, her brain had been lying to her and she had been living 2 truths. She was obviously a boy, but at the same time she knew she wasn’t, and after years of suppressing and battling this contradiction it came to her loud and clear she is a she, she is Tea.

Her personal journey sparked an ever growing interest in the value of doubt and doubting yourself and the world around you. Not the negative disabling kind of doubt, no we are talking about the kind of doubt that can drive creativity and self-growth. Or as she titled it: The joy of doubt - how doubt and uncertainty can make you happier and more creative.

It is hard to encapsulate what actually happened in her thought provoking talk. A journey on the history of uncertainty, how philosophers play with the notion of doubt, touching on quantum physics (!), and how everything good in this world is inspired by our own inability to understand the world.

This pursued of truth never felt more absent in our society. We are dissatisfied with reality, preferring the distorted version over the real deal. Our ever growing interest in gossip, reality tv, our selfie culture and our clickbait love, seems to be evidence of that. But on the same token we are aware of this distorted reality that we consume. It is when we actively question and doubt it, we start to engage and look for answers. It is through doubt – whether “intrinsic” (self-doubt) or “extrinsic” (doubt about aspects of the world around us) – that we can overcome our biases, question them and open new avenues. Doubt that has driven the great philosophers, scientist and artist of our time. Being able to doubt is one of our great luxuries and in a world where the truth seems to be dead, doubt will help us open our eyes.

Discover doubt

I strongly encourage you to listen to her talk here. It left me in a state of wondrous doubt, a place where I can see my doubt a little less like the evil twin sitting on my shoulder and more like the fun playmate to help me out.